There are charges pending in the accident that took Christopher’s life. People have different feelings about this which I won’t adress. Today, I got a call from my designated victim advocate, Helene. She is very kind, but the simple act of calling me throws me back to that night in December that forever changed my life.
In today’s conversation, she told me that a trial date was set for November 17, adding that it would not be a surprised if it changed. As a matter of fact, there will be an appearance on October 27 at which they will decide if they are ready to go to trial. She also explained that she was waiting to hear from the prosecutor in the case to find out when he would be ready to meet with me.
I had known that once discovery in the case progressed that I would have an opportunity to learn the details from that night, but I didn’t realize that they might want to meet with me. Apparently, he would want to hear from me and to get to know me and, through me, I assume, Christopher. I had done this already several months back with another staff member.
I am so ready to move forward, but this legal process pulls me back; pulls me under, when you consider trying to float down a river. I want to keep moving, but I am like a dog with a chain and I was just jerked back. It totally drained me of my energy for the day, which was already lacking.
I am still trying to decide what I want to know about that night. I’ve thought that I wanted to see pictures, but I have been advised that it is not necessary nor would it be wise. I feel like I might be the kind of person who would go talk to kids about the reality that I discovered: speed kills. I can’t do that without pictures. Further, if this goes to trial, there is the chance that pictures could be made public. I would hate to see pictures in the paper that i have not previously seen.
The good thing about the legal process is that I have no control in anything, except that if there is a plea deal, they will ask my thoughts. Alternatively, if it gets to trial and sentencing, they will ask my thoughts. I have no idea what my thoughts might be at that point.
How could I as I don’t know my thoughts today.